Whose Problem Is It?
When kids fall behind or run into problems at school, whose problem is it? And how can problems be fixed?
Not every school is going to fit every child perfectly. That is why smart, struggling, average and troubled kids can all have school problems. Who should fix them?
There's no doubt that school can be a tough place for a child. Students are expected to follow the rules, do their work, respect the school staff and treat their classmates with care. It's no wonder that children sometimes stray from these expectations a little--or a lot. For one thing, younger primary school children are still caught between a "me-centered" view and the more difficult task of empathizing with others. Also, children who are struggling with some aspect of school: learning, socializing or following rules, often don't have all the tools necessary to deal with problems in the correct way.
So when your child or a child in your classroom runs into a problem, who should deal with the problem? The child, the teacher, the school or the parents? If you said "everyone," you're right. Often, helping a child overcome issues at school requires collaboration from many people. The good news is that taking this approach often results in a happier child. The bad news is that is takes a lot of work and effort for it to be successful.
Parents must be willing and able to work with their child at home and enforce agreements, whether it means checking homework, keeping an open dialogue with the teacher or taking away rewards. Teachers must be willing to add or change things to the classroom in order to accomodate a plan for helping the child. This could mean diligent notetaking of the child's progress, or allowing the child to meet with another school staffer or work on a special project.
The school must also be willing to accomodate the needs of a child who is having problems in school. For serious problems, such as diagnosing learning abilities or dealing with inappropriate or aggressive behavior, it may mean setting up meetings, working with specialists, or constant monitoring.
As with anything else in life, the best approach to solving a problem at school is the one that works best for that particular child. And often that approach will involve a number of adults at school and at home who care about helping the child succeed.
